Category: Music Parents

Adult Beginners on Musical Instruments are Fabulous

Adult beginners take up about 20% of my studio. I absolutely love to teach them how to play a musical instrument for many reasons. Here’s why.

Adult Beginners Are Dedicated

Adult beginners are generally really good at practicing regularly. They have a goal – to play well – and they know there’s only one way to achieve it. Practice.

Adult Beginners Learn Quickly

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” ~ Chinese Proverb.

Many adults want to catch up to where they would be if they started learning as a child. Luckily, their brains are fully developed so in the first year they gain about three years’ worth of skill. Children’s brains and muscles are still developing, so they take longer to learn things

Don’t believe me? Check out an adult beginner’s piano book. The last pieces are about the same level as the end of the third book in the children’s series.

I Don’t Have to Dumb Myself Down

When I teach a practice technique to a grade schooler, if they ask why it works, I have to say, “magic,” because I will completely lose them if I explained why.

When I teach a practice technique to an adult, I can go into the psychology of why it works and how we’re going around a wall our subconscious minds built rather than through. This is one of my favorite things.

Emotional Performances

This goes back to having a fully developed brain. It also goes to having more life experiences. If I assign something like the Moonlight Sonata, which should be played with tons of emotion, I can get it instantly from an adult. I usually have to teach someone younger than 8th grade how to fake it.

Adult Beginners Know What They Want

Most adult beginners usually have a clear vision of what they want to get out of their music lessons. While my job is to push them forward, they will show me the direction they want to be pushed.

Most want to use the piano to relax and maybe release some emotions. These are things that are necessary to life as a musician, anyway.

Some absolutely love the classical music and they want to be classically trained. The classical music is what drives them. Some are driven by pop, musicals, and Disney.

Some adults have a different purpose to learning their instrument. They want to learn how to compose or play in a band or church. I keep these things in mind when helping them decide on repertoire.

Ergonomics

Maybe I’m crazy, but I absolutely love helping people with the ergonomics of their instrument. I want them to enjoy the life-building activity of playing their instrument. I don’t want them to have to deal with tennis elbow, carpal tunnel, or some other form of tendonitis.

Because our bodies are not what they used to be, we have to be more careful about injury. Depending on the person, I sometimes start out with various upper-body stretches that target the common issues that flutists or pianists have. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

I Get to Watch their Brain Grow

Studies have shown how great learning an instrument is for your brain. Here’s an article with a few different studies about that.

With kids, I don’t notice the difference because their brain is growing, anyway. I can’t always tell that their brain growing faster than it was before because I didn’t necessarily know them before.

With adults, I can really see a difference after the first year of playing an instrument. I’m not sure how to measure it, but they learn faster, remember things better, and are all-around sharper. It’s fun to see.

Conclusion

As you can see, I love working with adult beginners. I think it’s fabulous to see people learn new skills at every stage of life. If you’re not feeling great about starting later, I hope this either helps you strengthen your resolve or decide to start.

Winter Break – Did You Practice?

In the USA, schools and studios alike are just coming off of Winter Break. Some students took the opportunity to practice every day. Some didn’t touch their instruments. Let’s take a look at this phenomenon a little more closely

The Students who Practiced

These are students who practiced at least three times per week. There are several reasons students practice over winter break.

  1. Intrinsic Motivation – this is the goal. This means the students practice because they enjoy playing.
  2. Parents – the parents make their children practice. This is a really good reason, too. It will eventually turn into the intrinsic motivation. This was my motivation when I was growing up.
  3. Boredom – there’s nothing going on, so I might as well practice. This is a really good one, too. It’s the stage before Intrinsic Motivation. This was also one of my motivations when I was a student living in the country.
  4. Habit – this is why the pros practice. They always practice at this time, so it’s habit.

The Students who Practiced a Little

These are students who practiced five times or less in the past two weeks. Their reasons are the same as those above, but their motivation wasn’t as high.

Their practice might have a little more to do with their parents, but that’s just fine. It shows their parents are invested in their musical education.

The Students Who Didn’t Practice

This category accounts for about 25% of my studio. There are three reasons for no practice over Winter Break:

  1. The student was on vacation with no access to a musical instrument.
  2. The break was over scheduled – Christmas is a time of running around like a chicken with its head cut off.
  3. The student didn’t want to practice.

The first two reasons are out of the student’s control. The last reason is the heart of the matter and the most common.

It’s Okay to Take a Break from your Instrument

Everyone gets burned out sometimes. That’s when we need to walk away for a week or two. When you come back, you’ll remember how much you loved it and will be able to play with a zest you forgot you had.

Notice I said a week or two, not longer. As with any discipline, you need to schedule a time to get back into that discipline. Practicing is definitely a discipline.

Getting back into the discipline of practicing will be hard for the first few weeks. You might want to take a look at some of these tactics to help you get back into the swing of things.

Prevent Burn-Out

Make sure you schedule time to enjoy life. I don’t mean video games or television, I mean go outside of your house.

  1. Go for a run or a bike ride.
  2. Climb a tree.
  3. Go to the art museum.
  4. Garden.
  5. Get together with friends.
  6. See a concert.

I’m sure there are plenty of better lists out there, but this is a start. Another thing I do is go online and do a search for “free things to do in [your city here]. ”

Music Is Art

We can’t produce art if we are only practicing all day. We need to go out and enjoy life. Then we use a studio break to take a break, we do just that. Experiencing life gives you the maturity to play better – more emotion, more tone colors, more artistic expression.

Conclusion

If you practiced during Winter Break, I’m proud of you.

If you didn’t practice over winter break, I hope you were able to fill your bucket so you can come back to your instrument and create art.

Relationships with the Music Stores

It’s important to find and support a good music store. That store will support you. I hope this guide helps you find your music store home.

I walk into my favorite music store and the people who work there all know me by name. They greet me with a genuine smile and I know they’re happy to see me. My day is instantly brighter.

Perks of Having a Good Relationship with the Music Store

If you have read any of my blog posts, you know that I like lists. They clarify things. I’m writing the list below and explaining what I mean for each item in the sections afterwards. There are more perks than just these four things, but these are the main ideas.

  1. Good Advice
  2. Networking
  3. Trust
  4. Try Things Out

Good Advice

If you find yourself stumped, you have a ton of musicians at your fingertips to give you advice. For example, my first time switching a piano student from Faber to Bastien after the primer level, I wasn’t sure what to do. The student needed the faster-moving method book, but there was a big gap between where the Primers ended between the methods. Faber goes much slower than Bastien.

I asked the person behind the counter what he would recommend. He mentioned a couple of ideas – write a few pieces of music to get her through the gap, or use the first few pages of a third lesson book to get her to that point.

I didn’t want to re-invent the wheel, so I chose the second option and the student got through the gap famously.

Networking

The people at the music store know the best local bands, where they play, and what times. They know what music seminars are coming to town. They know which ensembles have openings and which ensembles have good reputations. All you have to do is ask, and they’ll help you out.

Trust

If you have created a good relationship with the people in the music store, you can trust them to give you good service. The repair techs will take their time on your instrument. If you have a problem with a product that you bought, they’ll trust you that it was an actual problem, and they won’t doubt you.

Try Things Out

A good music store will allow you to try things out that you would be surprised about.

When I accidentally put my electric metronome through the washer and dryer, I went to my favorite music store. I told them what happened and I brought my piccolo along. They opened up the metronome packages and allowed me to try each electric metronome that they had. The very last one was the one I could hear above the sound of the piccolo. The salesman knew how to open the packages so they would close up without anyone knowing.

I had no clue that trying out the packaged metronomes was even an option. When I was younger, they had metronomes behind a glass case that you could try. That’s why I brought my piccolo. I was very appreciative.

Supporting a Good Music Store

I personally drive half-way across my city in order to go to the music store that treats me right. The techs know what they’re doing and the staff is fabulous. In order to go there, I drive right past the music store that is 8 blocks from my house because they don’t treat me right. In the past, I have driven up to three hours in order to take my flute to a tech that I liked.

What with the amount of students that I have, the amount of sheet music that I buy is the equivalent of buying a student instrument once a year. I recommend this music store a lot to my students and to my colleagues. I support them the best that I can.

It’s important to me to have the resources that I need from the places that I go. I try not to order online if at all possible so I can support my local music store. I hope music stores never go away because online shopping can’t hold a candle to the service you get at a good music store.

Finding a Good Music Store

Good music stores can be hard to find. Some choose to hire people who are arrogant and condescending. Some choose to hire people who are only after your money and treat you like a cash cow. Some choose to hire repair techs who use shortcuts on your instrument, which makes things worse in the long run.

Test out the music stores within driving distance from you, systematically.

One test is to peruse the music. Do they ask if they can help? Do they stand there with an attitude?

Another test is to try to strike up a conversation. How do they respond? Do you have a nice conversation, or do they act like you’re stupid?

A really good test is to ask if they carry a folding music stand that gets at least 5 ft tall. They probably don’t. How do they treat you? If they just apologize or offer to order one, those are the best responses. Do they say that those stands don’t exist? They exist online. Do they talk about how you don’t need a stand that tall for various reasons? It’s a good idea to have one that tall for practicing while standing up.

If you need to get your instrument repaired, call around to all the stores in the area and ask to talk to them. Ask about their processes. How do they treat pads that stick? If they mention powder paper, run the other direction. That’s an emergency-only item.

As you can see, it’s a process, but it’s important. What if you unwittingly took your flute to a tech that makes your flute worse? What if you were sold something that’s unnecessary or the wrong thing for you? It’s important to take the time to find a good music store.

Conclusion

It’s important to find and support a good music store. That store will support you. It’s also just as important to not support the bad music stores, for obvious reasons. I hope this guide helps you find your music store home.

Practicing Music Via Osmosis

It’s a way to correct mistakes and problems without nitpicking, so I like to use it with a student who seems demoralized. This is for the student who feels that everything they do is wrong.

This practice technique is very effective, but it isn’t one you can do yourself. You need a partner, preferably one who you want to emulate. I use this as I teach for both flute and piano, so there are sections in here that just apply to flute alone. The other portions apply to both instruments.

What is it?

Practicing music via osmosis is just playing with someone else. It’s a way to correct mistakes and problems without nitpicking, so I like to use it with a student who seems demoralized. This is for the student who feels that everything they do is wrong.

The way this works is the person who needs it automatically adjusts based on what the other person is doing. It’s an involuntary reaction, they don’t even realize they’re doing it.

When do I use it?

There are various times when it’s a good idea to use this practice technique, and I’ll cover each one separately.

  1. You just can’t “get” a section of music.
  2. You want to learn good tone quickly.
  3. You want to learn good technique quickly.
  4. You need to build your confidence.
  5. Someone needs to practice but wont (*whistles innocently*).

You just can’t “get” a section of music.

It’s easier to mimic someone who’s better than you when you’re playing the exact same thing at the exact same time. When playing together, your bodies naturally sync, all the way down to your heartbeats (an article about that is here). This is a good idea for when you’re repeatedly missing a note or a rhythm.

I use this more with piano students than with flutes. If they’re working on a recital piece, need help with rhythm or correct notes, I play the exact same thing right along with them a couple octaves higher on the piano. The issue goes away by the second or third time we repeat that section, like magic.

You want to learn good tone quickly.

This section is for flute alone. Duets work the best for transferring tone. Your tone quality and color should naturally reach towards each other (more on that here).

I’ve seen this work instantly with my students. I’ll play the flute with a new student who still has a beginner tone, and the student’s tone will instantly become the same as mine. Afterwards, the student’s tone will be better than before, but it won’t be the same as my tone.

You want to learn good technique quickly.

The better player sits/stands up straight, so do you. The better player holds their hands in a different way, so do you. You don’t even think about it, you just automatically do it.

Another aspect of this point is that you take on stylistic things that the other player is doing, such as the way they handle their large intervals and their phrasing.

I sing in a church choir. I’m only choir-trained, but ever since I graduated college, I’ve always sat by the best singer in my section. Just by singing next to her, I learned how to hit the high notes without closing my throat, how to choose correct diction for the situation, and how to nail the tough intervals without trying.

You need to build your confidence.

The confidence of the better player will transfer to you. You will feel the other player exude confidence and your body will pick up on those vibes and take them on. It will only be bit-by-bit. You may not feel it the first few times, but it will come.

The exception to this is when you feel like the better player is perfect and you are the only one who messes up, ever. This is not true, by the way. Everyone messes up, even the pros. Please recognize that this way of thinking is a fallacy and allow the better player to transfer some confidence towards you.

Practice Motivation

Practicing together is a lot of fun. It helps the non-practicer associate practicing with fun. It also forces them to practice.

Here are some examples that I’ve seen over the years.

  1. Sometimes I’ll play with students who aren’t practicing to help them get ready for a contest. This is usually a last-ditch effort, and I make sure that the student knows that this shouldn’t be relied upon.
  2. I know a couple of moms who practice with their kids to get them to practice. They play the exact same thing an octave up or down on the piano or on a different instrument, depending on where their talents lie.
  3. I’ve seen section leaders offer to practice together with that one person who isn’t practicing or their style isn’t meshing with everyone else. This only happens with the really good section leaders or with adults. This last example leads us to…

Ettiquite

Be careful in offering to practice together to help the other person. If it’s done in the wrong way, you’ll easily offend the other person.

If you ask with the attitude of, “Let’s have fun!!!” that will work really well. This works best if you’re just proposing to goof off (and sneakily work on tone).

If you’re in rehearsal, a good way to ask is, “We’re not syncing on this part. Would you mind staying after rehearsal so we can get on the same page?”

If you ask with an attitude of, “You need help with this,” that will only work well if you’re a parent or the teacher. If you’re a peer, you’re asking for trouble.

If you’re the one who wants the help, all you have to do is ask. I’ve never heard of anyone denying someone this kind of help. The other person will be honored that you asked them. They’ll also be excited because it will be fun.

Conclusion

If you decide to implement this in your practice, I know it will work just as well for you as it has for me and my students. I hope this article also gives you the courage to ask for the help that you need.

How about you? Have you seen the magic of this technique in action?

I Forgot How to Read Music!

I never forgot how to read music, but every year I have a few students who do. This is what I do to bring them back.

Okay, I never forgot how to read music, but every year I have a few students who do. It happens pretty often, just like 1st graders forget how to read words over the summer.

What Not To Do

Don’t write the notes into your music. You’ll pay more attention to the letters than you do to the notes, and you won’t re-learn the information. You also won’t notice which octave in which to play the notes.

A Grand Staff

Have a grand staff sitting next to your music while you practice. I really like this free one. It may be frustrating to look up the note you can’t remember every time, but this is how you learn. After awhile, you won’t have to look up the notes anymore.

Note Naming Worksheets

These are grueling, but they work. My favorites are these ones. They’re no-nonsense and they’re free.

Anchor Notes

What works well with anchor notes is that once you get those, you can use your intervals to get you around while you gain your fluency..

The Treble (G) Clef circles around the G. The two dots on the Bass (F) Clef are on either side of the F. Middle C is another easily identified note.

When my students are reviewing scales, I use the popcorn method, described here. If a student is struggling with note names, the student must name the note on the flashcard before they play the scale, chord, cadence, or arpeggio. If the flashcard shows a C or a G and the student gets the name of the note wrong, I draw again.

The students want to get a C or a G because in the 5-finger pattern, those are the only two without flats and sharps. This drives them to learn the C’s and the G’s on both staves. That’s a lot of anchor notes.

Flashcards

When I use flashcards with a student, I set the timer for a minute and have them say the name of the note and play it. This helps them understand which octave to put the note into on the keyboard.

I don’t care whether they say the name or play the note first. Usually they’ll name it first then play it, but it shows that they’re becoming more fluent when they play it first, then say it.

Fluency

The eventual goal is to get to fluency. In true fluency, you’re not even thinking note names. The goal is that you look at the note on the page and your finger automatically goes to the note. The name of the note is an afterthought. That is what it feels like to be fluent in the language of music.

Conclusion

I usually use all of these tactics at the same time, but sometimes I only do one or two of them because I can tell the student didn’t forget as much as they think. It’s a tough road, but it works. I usually talk to the students and say what the steps will be and tell them it’s going to be tough, but they can do it. They are usually more than willing to relearn how to read the music.

I Forced My Kid to Take Piano Lessons for 4 Years and She’s Thankful

I chose a goal piece for my daughter to be able to quit piano. Once she got to that level, she decided against it.

I started giving my oldest daughter piano lessons in 2nd grade. She loved it. She responded well to everything I taught her. She enjoyed the competitions and being able to play songs from Disney.

The Turning Point

In my daughter’s school, she’s allowed to start band in 5th grade. A little young, I know, but I went with it. I started helping her choose an instrument in 4th grade so I could get a good deal on a used student instrument. She chose the clarinet.

After she chose the clarinet, she asked if she could quit piano when she starts band. My husband and I said no, she could play both, just like I play both the flute and piano.

The Goal

We told her that she can quit piano when she can play the first movement of the Moonlight Sonata. Our reasoning for this was because it’s far enough along that she can pick it back up if she wants. She could decide to plunk out most things by that skill level, too, if she had to.

My husband grew up with an age limit. When a child of his family graduated high school, they could quit piano. We decided if she has a goal piece of music, she could speed ahead and get it done if she wants, and she’ll still hit the level of musicianship that we wanted for her.

That being said, we made it very clear that she will always be playing at least one musical instrument until the end of high school. If she quits the piano, she would have to stick to the clarinet through the end of high school.

Our Reasoning

We were very clear on our reasons for wanting her to be playing an instrument.

  1. Brain Development. We saw over the years several studies about how being an instrumentalist helps with brain development. We want her to have those brain development aids for her while her brain is developing.
  2. Emotional Outlet. We wanted her to be able to come home from a tough day at school and bang it out on the piano, especially through those rough Jr. High years.
  3. Dementia. This is an odd one for the list, but I found an article that said those who played an instrument were less likely to get dementia.

7th Grade

At the beginning of 7th Grade, I told my daughter that she’s ready for learning the Moonlight Sonata, if she wishes. She said that she still hates piano, but she wants to learn Golden Aspens by Joyce Grill first. As I tried not to smile, we started on the piece (fist pump!).

After that, she still made it clear that she hates piano, but she wanted to learn The Healing Garden by Carol Klose first. Once again, I tried not to smile as we started learning the piece.

In May, when she was about half-way through learning The Healing Garden, I decided to call her on it. I told her that she really likes playing the piano, but she’s not admitting it to herself or others. If she really hated the piano, she would have whipped out that Moonlight Sonata before I even gave her the go-ahead, and would have been working on it as soon as possible.

She didn’t say anything, but gave me a thoughtful look. After about 5 minutes, she told me that she still hates piano.

June 21, 2019

We had around 3 weeks left in learning The Healing Garden. She played it for me in her lesson, and when she finished playing it, she turned around. Here’s what she said:

“I love this piece. It touches my heart. This is the first piece I’ve ever played that touched my heart. I think that you’re right. My head wants to quit piano, but my heart doesn’t.”

I succeeded in not crying, but I misted up. I replied, “This is why we do fun music. I always have you playing a serious piece and a piece that you choose. This is why it’s so important to have a piece for every emotion. Sometimes your serious piece will do that, too, but you need to have something so that you can play your heart out.”

Thank You!

Carol Klose and Joyce Grill, if you’re out there, thank you so much for writing those pieces! They turned my surly 7th grader around.

Getting Multiple Kids to Practice

Two ways to motivate all your kids to practice, at the same time, with minimal effort.

I was talking to one of my piano moms the other day. All of her kids are taking music lessons, most of which play two instruments. She told me what she’s been doing lately to get her kids to practice. Here’s what she’s doing. She gave me permission to share her story.

Sibling Rivalry

Usually sibling rivalry isn’t a good thing, but sometimes it’s good to take advantage of it. What she’s doing is having her kids write down their practice minutes. At the end of the week, the one who has the most minutes gets a shake.

How Is It Working?

She says it’s working fantastically.

On the first day, the younger kid would practice half an hour, then the older kid would practice 45 minutes. Then the younger one would practice 20 minutes, to catch up with a 5 minute buffer. The second day turned out similarly.

I have yet to find out who won last week, but they were definitely determined to win that shake!

What if My Kids Aren’t Competitive?

Personally, my kids are not competitive. At all. Ever.

The older one would let the younger one win because she felt bad. The younger would let the older one win because she wanted to give her sister the gift of a shake. All practicing would halt.

In order to motivate my kids with a reward, I have to set a bar and anyone who passes the bar by the allotted time gets the prize.

For example, I would have to say that whoever gets 300 minutes of practice by Saturday 9AM gets to go for a shake. That’s 30 minutes at 5 days a week x 2 instruments. Knowing them, the challenge would be done by Thursday.

So, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to tape a piece of paper to the wall and find a coupon for shakes.

I did this in 2 seconds. Their initials are on the top.

To the Parent Getting Free Music Lessons Through their Child

When we met for the first time, you told me that you wish you could take lessons, too, because you either used to play or you have always wanted to play the flute or the piano. You wanted to take lessons, too, but you didn’t want to take the extra time or money away from the family for yourself. The kids come first. I saw right through you.

When we met for the first time, you told me that you wish you could take lessons, too, because you either used to play or you have always wanted to play the flute or the piano. You wanted to take lessons, too, but you didn’t want to take the extra time or money away from the family for yourself. The kids come first.

You didn’t know it, but I saw right through you. I offered you the easy chair in my studio, knowing you would learn, too. I’m happy about that.

Your eyes brightened when you saw that easy chair and you found out that I love it when parents watch the lesson. I told you that it works well to have a parent there, because they can solidify the information throughout the week. It becomes a 3-way conversation during the lessons.

I know that you’re going through your kids’ music every week and learning it, too. I know that you’re watching each lesson like a hawk, not because you don’t trust me, but because you want to learn everything you can during these lessons. You think I don’t notice, but I do.

I’m glad that you’re using your children’s lessons to learn the flute or the piano. I know that when your child hears you practicing, it normalizes practicing for your child. Your child hears you getting the music better and faster than her, and it drives her to do better. It actually makes your child one of the best in my studio.

I sincerely hope that your children’s lessons create a spark in you to learn the flute or piano better. I hope you will someday get to the point where you feel you can invest in yourself and get lessons.